Jeff Conine

You know Junior, some of the things we've done, man . . . I don't feel like we've done something wrong. Sometimes, man . . . I get this bad feeling. I told the padre the truth man, I like it here. Get to do what you want, nobody fucks with you. The only worry you got is dying. And if that happens you won't know about it anyway. So what the fuck man?
-- Bunny

So . . . Jeff Conine. Another over 40 Met. Whee! The Mets needed a right-handed bat off the bench after Damion Easley's ankle injury, and Conine is as good an available waiver trade as any, I guess. It's hard to get too excited about adding a two-month rental on the wrong side of FORTY, for the love of god, but take a look at this.




Basically, Conine is only going to be used in games against tough lefties to spell mostly Sean Green (who can't hit LHP at this point) in RF, or Delgado (who may or may not be able to hit anything at this point) at first; or as the right-handed PH off the bench. Given Delgado's stature, I think Green is more likely to get replaced, Delgado's shitty 2007 not withstanding. This is pretty much what the Reds have been doing with him. Anyway, if you combine Green (who can't hit lefties) with Conine (who can't hit righties) to form GREENINE, you end up with one relatively OK player.

Just for fun, here's what I think the Mets order will be like when they're facing LHP and RHP, once Lo Duca comes off the DL.



Holy crap, the Mets have been killing lefties this year. By the way, David Wright may as well be the devil as far as left-handers are concerned. That's a .630 slugging %. That's fucking terrifying.